He's Here!

Just wanted to let you know that he made it!  And everyone is doing well!  Well, Rudy is a bit jealous.  But then he figured out that his kisses were loved by all!

Make sure you head over to our Facebook page to vote on a name for our new addition!  The poll will be open through Monday!

Unnamed Baby on His Way!

Well, we didn't have too wait long to get our next placement.  Yes, it is true!  A little 8 week old baby is on his way to our home. So excited!

But I need your help naming him! Since I received so many awesome naming suggestions via comments, text, messages and email, I decided that YOU get to pick his name!  Hop over to our Facebook page and vote for your favorite or suggest a new one.  Just remember the two rules.

1- All names must be vegetables.  It is just how we roll here.
2- Can't use Rutabaga (Rudy), Peas, Carrots, Artichoke or Zucchini.

All set up and ready!

PS- The baby does have a real name.  But really that isn't of any consequence here because it will never be mentioned.

PPS- Sweet Potato has been veto'ed by the hubby.  I loved the nickname Tater, but apparently that is a redneck comedian that has a bad connotation for the hubs.  Sorry!

Unexpected Call

Since we have yet to make a decision about if/when/how we are going to grow our family, we are currently on "hold" with the county. This means we aren't on the "Available Beds List" that is used to call foster families when children come into care.  You might already see where this is going.

We just got a placement call.*insert shock* But wait- it gets better!

It was for 3 kids! 5 year old. 3 year old. And 4 months old.

Easy answer- No. If we go back on the list, it will be for 1 child under the age of 2.

But then they say, "Well, you were the only family available that could have taken all three. So we will be splitting them up. Would you consider taking the 4 month old?"

Oh gees! I knew that we'd have to talk this one over since it is in the realm of possibility if we decide to enter the crazy fostering world again. So I got some background of the case. And called the hubby.

We just feel like we still aren't ready to decide if we want to foster again. And we think we should really make that decision before, you know, accepting any placements. So there won't be a cute cuddly addition to our family.  At least not yet!

If this tells you anything, it should show that 1) the need for foster parents is real, 2) we are still straddling the fence and 3) you should become a foster parent to take the pressure off of us!  Just kidding about that last one. Well sort of.

Foster Friday: Lack of Details

With all of this placement call talk lately, I have heard the same question asked a few different ways.

Why are you so vague about the placement calls?  Why are there no details about the foster kids? Why did you blur Peas and Carrots faces out?

The answer is two-fold.  First, this is my story about being a foster mom.  The crazy process to be able to have that title.  The waiting involved for the little one(s) to be in our home.  And all the ups and downs of parenting someone else's kid(s). 

Second, there is a duty to protect the innocence of the foster children.  They did nothing wrong and quite honestly don't deserve to be in this position.  It is a horrible situation that would be hard for any adult to deal with and understand much less a child that still doesn't (and may not be capable to) understand how the world works.  In fact, policy dictates that we "are not free to share any information about your child and his/her family".  This can make answering questions asked about the child(ren) quite sticky at times.  But that's part of this crazy game.  No one said it would be easy!

So there you have it!  The vague-ness will continue.  But that isn't to say that if you have questions about foster parenting that you shouldn't ask.  It just means I might not be able to answer!   

Disaster Averted

The phone that was previously MIA has been located, picked up and back in action waiting for "the call".

In addition to showcasing my joy for having my phone back and my awesome Mr. T necklace, this is a pretty good "after" picture from my haircut with interview-style nerves. 

Now back to your regularly scheduled programming aka waiting with a side of a little more waiting!

Simple Advice

When you are expecting a call that could change your life at any moment...

don't lose your phone.

Ugh!  Hoping it turns up soon!

Wow! They weren't kidding!

We just received another placement call. Two boys (5 and 7). Declined due to their situation.

It is weird for this to be our third "no" to a placement call.  We started this process almost a year ago and are so excited to share our home with little ones.  But I keep reminding myself that it does no good for anyone (us or the kids) to accept a placement where we aren't comfortable with.

Things really are picking up! And they are already having problems finding available foster parents due to the holiday weekend.  I'm curious to see if we will get any other calls this weekend.

The Calls are A-Coming!

We had heard through the grapevine that things had picked up and more children were coming into care.  This isn't too surprising since school is ending and a holiday weekend is approaching.  Typically when schedules change and stress levels increase is when more children come into care.  Normally the increases are seen when school ends (now), around holidays (now), and when school begins.  We were told to be ready and I guess they were right!

We just recieved our second placement call for two girls, ages 4 and 6.  We declined based on their situation.

Back to waiting.

Decision on "The Call"

We have thought about "the call" all weekend long.  While it was not the type of placement that we were expecting, it was still a situation that we considered, discussed, pondered and struggled to find the solution that would be right for us.

Before hearing the specifics of the situation of this mother and child, we probably would have never considered a teenager.  But their situation (which I can't discuss) was positive to say the least, which made it tempting to open our arms to help and support this new family find their way in this crazy world.  Also with our strong commitment to shared parenting*, we were enticed with being able to live this daily with this unique placement.

At the end of the day, we do not feel comfortable parenting a 17 year-old at this time.  I could definitely see us taking a teenage mother/child placement in the future once we have a bit more experience in this parenting gig.  But we just didn't feel like we were the right fit for this particular placement right now.  While I think we could take on this young mother and her baby, that doesn't mean that we should.  Also, it was a little weird to think that I would be taking on the role of mother and grandmother all before I'm 30!

Even though I hate to turn away children in need, we are at peace with this decision.

*Shared Parenting-  a concept that is central to foster parenting where the foster parents continually work with the birth family to make parenting decisions (haircuts, piercing ears, activities, etc.) and communicate successes and struggles their child(ren) experience.  This ensures that everyone is on the same page, models positive parenting approaches, and provides consistency for the kids. 

**A few readers expressed their concerns about having a 17 year-old alone in our home before/after school while we are at work.  While I completely understand this concern, it would not be applicable (at least for a while) to this situation.  We are not allowed to leave any foster child alone.  They may only be left with an approved babysitter or at an approved supervised activity (sports, clubs at school, part-time job, etc.).  It is only after both the foster parents and the child's social worker are comfortable with the child being left alone that this would be allowed to occur.

Foster Friday: "The Call"

Yesterday we got "a call" for respite care.  Very exciting!

Today I thought would be plenty eventful with our family growing from 2 to 4 for the weekend.

But then we got "the call".  "The call".  This is a call for placement, not respite care.  We have been waiting for over a month for this phone call.  It is weird that it is here!

But nothing ever goes quite as you expect, especially in the foster care world.  While we have a preference of 0-4 years old, the call was for a 4 month old and the 17 year old mom.

Hmmm.  We are still thinking about this one.  Never expected to become foster parents and grandparents all at once.

The best news is that they don't need placement until Monday.

We'll be thinking this one over all weekend long.

If you are interested in how we got to this point, check out our journey here.